Cleveland Browns (4-8 SU, 5-7 ATS) vs. New England Patriots (9-3 SU, 6-6 ATS)
NFL Week 14
Date and Time: Sunday December 8, 2013 1pm EST
Where: Gillette Stadium, Foxborough MA
by Tim, Football Handicapper, Predictem.com
Point Spread: Cle +11/NE -11
Over/Under Total: 45
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The Cleveland Browns will milk Upper Management out of another paycheck when they invade the wintry confines of Gillette Stadium this Sunday. The New England Patriots are coming off a 4th quarter come-from-behind win against the Texans and a player endorsed letter writing campaign to NFL offices thanking the NFL for this late season non-divisional Day Off. The Browns have inquired as to Bernie Kosars availability and this matchup between the Pats and Browns—by all appearances—seems to be a heaven-sent, lovable, apple strudel with lightly powdered sugar on top for the Patriots appetite. The Browns, on the other hand, are making plans for their on-the-cheap cruise getaway with fans across Lake Erie scheduled for mid-May! Lets take a look at this apparent mismatch and pick us a winner!
Beside the blowouts to Cincy in Week 11 and Pittsburgh in Week 13, the only embarrassment the Browns experienced in 2013 was last weeks loss to 2012 Conference USA Champion—The Jacksonville Jaguars. The Browns have a pretty good defense ranked 4th overall in the NFL but forgot to use the defense in the 32-28 loss to the Jaguars. QBs Brandon Weeden and Jason Campbell are both highly questionable against the Patriots since both have suffered enormously from concussions suffered in Week 12 (Campbell) and last week (Weeden). Campbells concussion is understandable since he resembles an NFL QB. Weedens injury is questionable since no Jaguar has hit anyone in this 2013 season to date (except the fan base with ticket prices!). In any event, Caleb Hanie was activated from the Dont Call Us, Well Call You roster and former Pizza Hut Delivery Great, and former Star of the hit TV Show Everybody Loves Ramon turned NFL QB Alex Tanney was signed to the Browns Warm Body Squad. The hits keep comin in Cleveland! Lets look at the Pats.
The Patriots are like the film Gosford Park. The people dont speak our language, the outfits are regional and indistinguishable, theres plenty of wealth to languish at, the leader of the group (Belichick) seems to be hell-bent on proposing a working mans persona while living an eccentric existence, and all-the-while a murder occurs. The show is boring, contrived, narrowly focused but seemingly quite complex and sophisticated while adding intrigue to capture the interest and imagination! THAT, my friend, IS the PATS! Win, Win, Win! All the Pats do is W-I-Nyear-in-and-year-out, the Pats just WIN! The Patriots offense is 6th in points, 9th in total yards, 4th in first downs, 10th in passing yards, and 3rd in rushing TDs. The Pats defense is 10 in points against, 5th in turnovers, 10th in passing yards allowed, but Hold ON!the Pats are 31st in rushing attempts against and 31st in rushing yards allowed. Is there a chink in the Chowda Heads armor?
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Well, No, there isnt a chink in the Pats armor as far as this game is
concerned. The Browns are 30th in the NFL in rushing attempts for and 28th
in rushing yards for. The Browns are also a dismal dead last (32nd) in the
NFL in rushing TDs for. BUTand this is a very big BUTif the Browns continue
to put defenseless men at QB and there is nobody beyond a Former Major League
Short Reliever to play the position, then the Browns will be forced to run
the ballwhich is probably their only chance against the Patriots. With
Trent Richardson completely revealed (allegedly) as a NFL RB Poser and
dismissed, the Browns would have to turn to 54 year-old Willis McGahee who
runs like he is delivering cocktails in a Posh Diner surrounded by irreplaceable
Hummels, or yesterdays promising nominative RB Chris Ogbannaya who is a
proven decent blocker in pass protection (but not a proven runner of the
ball). The Browns cant get it right. The Pats never stop getting it right.
Lets take a look at who will cover in this massive matchup in Massachusetts!
LordI do, very much, detest hearing The Sox Man, the Sox are gonna win the series! and in the middle of the Patriots 3rd quarter, Yankees suck. Yankees suck! Yes, Chowdas, the Yankees do indeed suck. But nothing sucks worse than being told something sucks when you already know something sucks! In fact, that sucks worse than Yankees suck! Browns cant get a break; Mariano Rivera comes out of the clubhouse, puts on a Browns uniform, and beats the Patriots in the 4th quarter. Other than thatthe Browns have very little chance of covering in this game. The only chance is if Belichick knows a division rival will be played out of town next week? Im taking that chance! New England plays Miami in Miami next weekend. Belichick gets to a third quarter lead and pulls some starters! New Englands 18 point lead is erased by 3 Browns field goals and the Browns loseBUT COVER!!!!
Tims Pick to Cover the Point Spread: Cleveland Browns +11